Chocolate Frenzy
by Spontaneous Muse
Summary: Midna has never heard of 'chocolate' before. Link forces her to have some. And now, all hell has broken loose. Oh S***. Mild language. Slight Parody of 'Cheese' in Fosters Home, as well as Parodies of any other random spazzing child.


Hey, Its Alei again!

I hope you've been enjoying my fic, Glade of Light. Its really good, read it!

Well, it's the new years. I was over at my grandparents house, and I got this sudden CRAVING of chocolate, so I ate like… a whole hershey's bar, a kitkat, and various other chocolates I managed to find. And today, my dad brought home these exquisite Swiss Chocolates, I ate three already.

So, because I have a sugar rush, here goes!

* * *

"What is that?"

Midna looked disgustedly at the brown rectangle that was sitting on silver foil. She poked it. "Its… hard."

"Its chocolate." Link replied.

"Chaw-coe-lit?" She repeated slowly. "Sounds like a disease." She poked it again. "Does this cause strange symptoms?"

"Depends on which symptoms you mean." Link told her. "It can cause hyperness, twitches, and cravings. As well as yells of 'I WANT CHOCOLATEZ' over and over."

Midna leapt back a good three miles as if the chocolate has caught on fire. Link blinked as the imp suddenly vanished. "I was joking!" Link yelled.

Midna, still far away, replied in a high pitched tone, "It's gonna eat me!"

"No!" Link yelled. "Your supposed to eat _it_!" He broke off a square and ate it. "See?"

Midna floated slowly back towards Link, and sat down. She watched as Link chewed on the chocolate, and made continuous 'mmm' sounds as he enjoyed the sweet, rich, and chocolaty taste. Midna however, took that as something completely different. "Its trying to talk!" She yelped. "Keep it in your mouth! Don't let it see me!" Midna squealed.

Link swallowed noisily ('Ew." Said Midna) and turned to the imp. "Look, its nothing fatal, ok? Just try some, you'll see."

Midna's eye widened with the challenge, and then gingerly broke off a square. She took a deep breath, and nibbled at the end.

Her eyes widened briefly, and then relaxed. "Its… good! And sweet." Midna replied. She bit off a bigger piece. "Its…. So…good." She said dreamily, before stuffing the rest of her square in her mouth. She chewed vigorously, and swallowed. Link swore he could see the chocolate slide down her throat.

Midna was fine for a moment, she sat back. "That was good." She commented. And then, she twitched. Visibly. In fact, her body jerked.

Midna began to bawl. Link watched in amazement as she began to cry loudly. "Midna! Whats wrong?" Link asked, surprised. Midna didn't reply, but just continued to cry buckets.

Finally, Midna calmed down.

"…." Link reached out, scared, and then something strange happened. Midna bit him.

"Midna?!" Link asked, flailing his hand. Midna, teeth still clamped onto his fingers, sailed back and forth, refusing to let go.

"MORE CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!" She squealed loudly, making his bones vibrate in his finger. She continued to fly around on Link's hand, squirming and crying for more. "Midna!" Link exclaimed.

"Chocolate chocolate chocolate!!!" She screeched. She began to babble the word 'chocolate' in different languages.

Link finally flung her off, and she landed against a tree with a sickening thud. "Midna! Are you ok?!" Link asked, hoping he hadn't hurt her.

Midna was against the tree bark, head bowed and slumped over. Then her shoulders began to shake. "Oh no, please don't tell me your crying." Link breathed.

"hee." Midna said, her shoulders twitching uncontrollably. "hee."

Link came forward, and took a finger to raise Midna's face. But she shot up. "HEEE HEEE HEE!!" She squealed, and began to fly around in circles, making a blue, black, and white blurred halo around Link. "Hee hee hee hee heee!!!!!"

She suddenly screeched to a stop. "Chocolate." She said faintly. Link thought she calmed down. Uh, no. "chocochocochocochocochocochocoLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" She screamed.

Link flew back comically. "Midna, relax!"

"WHERE YOU KEEPING MY CHOCOLATE?!" Midna gurgled. "YOU HIDES IT. GIMME GIMME!"

Link struggled to understand the incoherent words she was spitting. "Midna! I don't have any m-"

"LIAR! I can smell it…" She sniffed loudly. "Here chocolate chocolate chocolate…." She cooed. "She's lost it." Link scoffed.

Midna turned and looked at link with her piercing red and yellow eyes. "Did you…"

"Did you just insult me?"

Link gulped.

"HOW DARE YOUUU!!!" She yelled, flailing her tiny fists. She continued to attempt to beat Link's chest with rapid rabbit punches. Link was relieved that it didn't hurt. Spoke too soon.

Her ponytail expanded, and grabbed Link. She drew him close. "I. want. Chocolate. Gimme. Now. Or. Hurt. Is. you." She said, carefully saying each word and syllable.

Link, fearing for his life, pointed at the rest of the chocolate. Big mistake.

Midna looked at it, and Link could've sworn he saw her eyes turn into pink hearts. "MY BABY!!!!" She yelled, and ate the whole bar in one humongous gulp. She then coughed. And choked. And squirmed.

Link stood back. "Oh cr-"

Midna turned into an arachnid. Somehow the Fused Shadow managed to lock around her head. Since there were no words to be said, the spider-like creature began to flail it's eight legs.

"Link?" asked a voice behind him. Zelda stepped beside him. "Uh, whats going on?"

"I gave her chocolate…"

That explained the whole thing. Zelda shook her head. "Link, don't you know chocolate is like a drug for Twili creatures?"

"I do now! How do I cure her?"

Zelda looked around. "Do you have any milk?"

Link stood there dumbfounded. "Milk?"

"Milk always counteracts chocolate. Haven't you ever had a double chocolate fudge cake? That's why you eat it with Milk." Her voice had major echoes of 'duh' in it.

"Right." Link said. "Uh… I have some here…" He took out a bottle, filled with clear white cow's juice.

Zelda took the bottle and whipped it at Midna while Link gaped. The bottle exploded on contact, soaking the arachnid.

Midna reverted back to her imp form, and floated down. "I… ugh.. my head…" Midna rubbed her temples. "Link… what happened?"

"You ate chocolate." Link said.

Midna gazed at him curiously. "Whats chocolate?"

Link paused for a second. "Its brown chuu jelly made to look good and is actually modified with all this shit and it makes you sick so don't ever eat it!" He explained quickly.

Midna blinked. "Chaw-coe-lit…." She repeated slowly. "Sounds like a desease."

Link nodded seriously. "You have no goddamn idea."


End file.
